I’ve mentioned to someone that watching the Jersey Shore is like watching Animal Planet. It’s like watching the mating habits of a cheetah, or something like that. There’s no doubt in my mind that this is true.
Where to begin? The douchebagginess of the cast leaves you speechless. There are no words to describe these self-professed guidos and guidettes. In tonight’s episode, the cast is reunited after making their way to MIA, which is Miami, a careful Mike explains. Sparks fly as soon as the girls realize that Angelina is here. Jenni and Snooki don’t like her. Sammi is still caught up with Ronnie. In case you didn’t know, they split up, but all in all, it looks like they were never apart.
Sammi loves Ronnie. Ronnie hates Sammie. Needless to say that they will have sex a few times this season. Ronnie is really angry about this whole thing. I love how The Situation tries to egg Angelina on to confront the bitchy behavior she keeps getting from the other girls. In the previews, we see that both Pauly and Vinny hook up with Angelina, while Vinny also hooks up with Snookie. This is after he promised his sex-obsessed uncles that he would only hook up with classy girls.
I love how aggressive Jenni gets when she’s a bit drunk and amped up. You don’t want to mess with her. In the last season, she threw a few punches, not just at girls, but at the boys, so you better watch out. Angelina is on everyone’s shit-list.
Warning: This post might offend you.
[Ed. note: I had to put some warning here, and I thought that this was kind of funny, but you have been warned!]