Big Brother Celebrity Hijack S01E07 (E4)

The next hijacker is Russell Brand. I love Russell. It’s too bad that he doesn’t do BBBM anymore, but I think the the new guys kick ass. They are very dynamic and raunchy, which is what BBBM needs.

The HM have been awake for an hour. Yesterday they nominated for the first time. The HM don’t know the results of the nomination. Jade, Anthony, John and Nathan are at the hot tub.

Most of the HM are at the sofas. John and Liam are in the bedroom. John thinks that he would be a good salesman. Russell is getting ready to take over the house. The HM applaud but they don’t know what they are getting into. Russell tells Jeremy to put his socks on his hands. The boys have to go to the bedroom, get into someone else’s bed and smell the pillows. Jeremy makes some monkey noises. Russell tells him to go to the bedroom and think about what he has done.

Russell makes them smell the pillows of the other people’s beds. Russell makes the HM leave the bedroom. Jeremy still has to stay in the bathroom. He tells Jeremy to do something erotic in the bathroom. It’s not erotic enough. Russell makes the HM order themselves from the most spiritual to the least spiritual.

Jade doesn’t know what it means. Russell explains, but Jade still doesn’t get it. Amy gets to go to the top because she thinks that she is more spiritual. Russell makes sure that the others follow his rules. Jeremy comes out of the bathroom. Russell sends Jeremy to the garden.

Amy and Jeremy are talking about Russell. Amy tells Jeremy that Russell would be the worst. Russell calls Jay to the diary room. Russell explains the way he dresses. He says he used different focus groups to come up with his look. Russell says that he doesn’t like what he wears. He says that it’s too tight on the balls. Jay said something about when Russell changed his looks. Jay asks him if he slept with Kate Moss. Russell says that nothing happened and that he prefers the company of men. He hasn’t slept with a girl since the age of 16.

Calista says that she thinks it’s weird that Russell Brand can watch her going for a poo and wiping her bum bum. Jay says that Callie is hot regardless. Russell calls Amy to the diary room. There is a chocolate cake waiting for her. He tells her to eat some cake. She asks to take it back to the house. He says no. They aren’t worth it. She asks for some coffee. Russell calls some for her. Russell calls Jeremy to get it.

Jeremy brings the coffee to Amy. Russell asks Amy if she’s single. She says that she has a boyfriend back home. She says he gets her flowers. Russell calls Jeremy to get some flowers for Amy.

Emilia wants Nathan to sing a song for her. She begs him. He complies. The HM stop and listen to his voice. It’s pretty good. Emilia says that he must get loads of women, it’s so romantic. Liam tells Nathan that he will get loads of offers. Liam chats him up on his PR setup.

Liam, John and Amy are in the bedroom talking. Russell explains his new play. An actor will be playing a disgruntled camera man who will burst into the house. The HM hear the fake argument. Jade is scared. She runs away. Amy finds it funny. John looks shocked. BB asks Paul to leave the house. Paul says no. BB tells the HM to go to the bedroom. BB says that security has been called. Latoya asks Paul if he wants a hug. He says yes and she gives him a cuddle. John comes out of the bedroom to keep Paul company. BB tells the HM to stop talking with Paul. John is called into the bedroom. Jade thinks that it isn’t real. Russell is coaching Paul for the exit. The blinds come up and Russell comes in with some security guys. The guys take Paul forcefully. The HM think that it’s John. John is offended.

Big Russell gathers all of the HM near the sofas. Russell tells them that it was all part of a task. Except for Jeremy. All of the other HM will get a luxury shopping budget. But not Jeremy. Some of the HM go into the diary room. They ask him if John knew if it was a fix. John is pissed in the garden. Callie and Liam talk with him. Russell asks all of the HM leave except Emilia. He asks her to do some stunts in the diary room. She says that she’s got a bikini on. Russell says it’s why he’s asking her. She does a contortion in a bikini. It’s pretty erotic. He tells Emilia to tell Amy that she’s chucked. John is still pissed off. Russell calls John to the diary room. Russell tries to make John feel better.

Big Russell calls all of the HM together to reveal who was nominated. Jade, Victor and Jeremy are nominated for eviction. I don’t know if these are the real nominations. John gives Jade a big cuddle. Liam is happy that he wasn’t nominated. Emilia and Amy are talking about Russell. Victor, Emilia and Jeremy are in the kitchen talking about the nominations. Emilia wants Jade gone. She doesn’t want the boys gone. Russell is leaving for the day and says goodbye. Emilia is talking about Russell to Jeremy.

Jade is in the diary room talking about the nominations. She thinks that Jeremy, Emilia and Nathan nominated her. Nathan and Latoya are horsing around in the living room. Nathan is pulling her to the table and splashes her with water. She calls him a bitch.

Nathan, Victor and Emilia are talking about the eviction.

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Author: range

I'm mathematician/IT strategist/blogger from Canada living in Taipei.

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