Steve Pavlina and Polyamory

Personally, it’s not for me. I couldn’t live without my wife and I don’t really want anyone else. Of course, I still find other women attractive, but my wife is my wife, and she’s the constant in my life.

I can understand that from a genetic point of view, men are made to get as many partners as possible. This is a known fact and makes for a nice and healthy genetic heritage.

In my opinion, it won’t take long for his marriage to implode. Usually, situations like these are deal-breakers marriage-wise.

Author: range

I'm mathematician/IT strategist/blogger from Canada living in Taipei.

6 thoughts on “Steve Pavlina and Polyamory”

  1. Hey Range,

    Thank you for writing this. I’m in the middle of listening to Steve and Erin’s podcast about polyamory (his giggle alone makes me say, “ohh, I get it”).

    His take reminds me so much of the unfortunate year and a half I spent at a hippie grad school in SF listening to all kinds of justification for sanctioned cheating. sigh.

    Really nice to meet you (googled here). And yes, Taiwan is awesome.

    S of 52 Faces

  2. That’s what it seems to me as well, someone acting out some fantasies that he didn’t get to do when he was younger. With two children and a thriving business, I think that’s kind of ridiculous, but then again, I’m not Steve.

  3. Hm, I dunno. I’m listening to it right now. And I am thinking, “Hm, um, it’s REALLY a problem if Erin doesn’t eat raw food with you?” Not to mention that bit about frisbee golf vs. chick movies. Um, really, you can just go do golf and hiking with people that like it. Monogamous people do that all the time and it’s not threatening the relationship. It doesn’t have to be only with someone you’re sexing. With regards to sexual needs, poly makes sense more than making your partner do something they don’t like, but he seems to talk MORE about the non-sexual social aspects of things. Um, this is what friends are for? Y’all aren’t Siamese twins, you can do some things differently from each other and it won’t automatically make the relationship die.

    I’m not against poly- I’ve done it (I can go either way), I’m all for honesty, whatever. But I’m kind of baffled as to how he makes it sound like more of an activity partner thing most of the time.

  4. I guess that some people enjoy poly and others don’t. It’s something quite common for younger men, to be seeing multiple partners at the same tim. I can’t speak for young women, since I’m a guy, but my guess is that it’s common as well. But most of the time, I think that it’s not poly, it’s just multiple partners with no intersects.

    The fact that Steve is all giddy and enthusiastic about it, is a bit disturbing to me. The way that he talks about jealousy is also baffling. We are all jealous sometimes, it’s hard not to be. If my wife found another partner, I’d be devastated.

    Then again, I’m not Steve and honestly, I don’t really feel like listening to the podcast. From Erin’s comments, it seems that Steve didn’t have much of a life before they met. He didn’t have much of a sexual life or had any real friends.

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