The Amazing Race Nanna Is Kickin Your Butt S16E01 (CBS)

It’s the start of another season of the Amazing Race. It looks like they still are operating on a lower budget. This season’s premiere was only one hour, so this means that the season finale will also be short. Kind of annoying, but it’s better than nothing.

The teams start out from LA. They will start from downtown. Brent/Caite are dating models. It’s that crazily stupid girl from the Teen America contest. It’s Jed/Cord are hick cowboys. Steve/Allie are father and daughter. Dan/Jordan are brothers. One of them is gay. I knew that. I almost typed ‘gay brothers’. Dana/Adrian are high school sweethearts. They have been married for 17 years. Jordan/Jeff from Big Brother. Jordan won BB. They have been dating long distance. Jodie/Shannon are grandmother and granddaughter. Both are triathletes. Louie/Mike are undercover police officers from Rhode Island. Monique/Shawne are BFF and attorneys. Joe/Heidi are married parents from El Secundo. Carol/Brandy are gay and dating from LA.

They need to read a clue and head to the airport using public transportation. The top 3 teams will leave on the 1^st flight. Everyone else will go on the 2^nd an hour later. They are leaving for Santiago, Chile.

Most of the teams figure out that they need to take a FlyAway bus from the train station. The models are waiting at a bus station. It’s kind of funny. They decide to run after the half gay brothers.

Some of the teams get onto a subway. Others are on the bus heading right to the airport. Monique/Shawne, Jeff/Jordan, Dana/Adrian are the 1^st ones to arrive so they get the tickets. All the others are one the 2^nd flight.

Jordan makes sure that everyone knows about Caite and her dumb speech during the Miss Teen America contest.

I guess Brazil is the money we’re supposed to get. Change it all.
Hick Cowboys not realizing that Chile is different than Brazil

The 1^st flight is a no go. They have to get another aircraft. Dana/Adrian rebook their flight immediately. Jeff/Jordan see this and do the same.

Teams must find their next clue from Valparaiso. The Hick Cowboys don’t have Chilean money but Brazilian, so they don’t get on. The cops and grandmas don’t get on either.

Jeff/Jordan are on their way 1^st. Brent/Caite pass them. They face a Roadblock. They have to walk a cable 120 feet up and the length of a football field. Brent makes Caite do it. Jordan does it because Jeff is afraid of heights. Dana/Adrian are stuck. Joe, Allie and the non-gay brother do it.

Brandy arrives and she does it. She’s shaking a lot. Caite arrives 1^st. Teams must now take a funicular and get their next clue.

The Hick Cowboys are last of course. They also look like total douches. Dan kind of falls off. Dan shimmies himself along. It’s a lot faster than walking. Adrian starts. Brandy has trouble. She’s shaking all over the place. Jordan is almost finished.

Brent/Caite don’t take the funicular. Jeff/Jordan take the right thing. Dan/Jordan do so as well. Teams must carry some paint up a steep hill and paint a house.

Brandy finishes. She looks exhausted. Brent/Caite have been walking around in circles. Jeff/Jordan find their house. They don’t have much to paint. They get their clue. Teams must now make their way to the pit stop for this leg of the race.

Jeff/Jordan run. Brent/Caite are 2^nd behind them.

Cord and Shannon do the cable walk. Fatty Adrian falls off. The safety specialist takes him back to the beginning. He needs to start over.

I have the balance of a drunken elderly person on stilts. We start losing our sense of balance at age 40, and I’m 71.
Grandma

Cord is fast. He passes Shannon. Jordan/Jeff finish 1^st. They win a trip for 2 to Vancouver. Brent/Caite finish 2^nd. They are hit with a 30-minute penalty for not taking the funicular.

Dan drops a brush so they have to backtrack. Steve/Allie go into someone’s house and start painting. It’s just a coincidence, but they’ve got the right color with them. The painters don’t know what to do with them. They finish painting the inside and realize that they were at the wrong place.

Monique/Shawne finish painting and leave for the pit stop. Cord finishes. Monique/Shawne finish 2^nd.

The grandma team are in 10^th. Adrian/Dana are in last place. Adrian gives it a try. The Hick Cowboys finish 3^rd. Dan/Jordan finish 4^th. They lost a paintbrush and get a 15-minute paintbrush. Steve/Allie finish 4^th. Joe/Heidi finish 5^th. Carol/Brandy finish 6^th. Brent/Caite finish 7^th. Dan/Jordan finish 8^th. Louie/Michael finish 9^th.

Adrian falls off again. It’s funny. Jody/Shannon finish 10^th. Adrian/Dana are eliminated.

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Relevant Links

The Amazing Race S14 @ Wiki

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