Jersey Shore Where’s My Boyfriend S04E08 (MTV)

The cast reunited, via Vulture

I’ve mentioned to someone that watching the Jersey Shore is like watching Animal Planet. It’s like watching the mating habits of a cheetah, or something like that. There’s no doubt in my mind that this is true.

Where to begin? The douchebagginess of the cast leaves you speechless. There are no words to describe these self-professed guidos and guidettes. The cast is heading to Italy to meet real Italians. We all know that this will only end in tears. You knew exactly where this was heading, ever since the last episode, we all saw that Snooki and Deanna are totally out of control. Much to Jenni’s dismay, who always has to pick up the pieces. This time around, Jionni is involved. From what we’ve seen of him or heard of him, it looks like he’s a lot more traditional than Nicole, something that she has yet to fathom or understand.

While they are out on the town, Nicole immediately gets drunk and shoes off her ass and vagina to Jionni while she’s dancing on the dance floor. That’s too much for Jionni the prude, and he runs off. Snooki, in a desperate state, tries to run after him but it’s to no avail. Ronnie catches him, but he makes no headway. Jenni chases him for blocks then comes home. Jionni dumps Snooki as soon as he comes back, packs up his stuff and leaves. Snooki doesn’t understand. Being drunk and acting like an idiot isn’t so much fun now, is it Nicole?

Did Nicole deserve this? No, obviously not, but she has been with Jionni for a while and should know exactly what he tolerates and what he doesn’t. Ever since the get go, she’s been pushing the envelope, and he made no secrets of disliking it. Nicole has trouble showing class and not acting like a skank, which comes to now surprise.

Warning: This post might offend you.

[Ed. note: I had to put some warning here, and I thought that this was kind of funny, but you have been warned!]

The show didn’t show up on my usual sites, so I decided to watch it online on MTV. It’s not bad.

Snooki passes her alcohol test but gets taken back to the police station. The other HM didn’t arrive in time. They give the info to the cops on the scene. They realize that she hit a cop. They try to pick her up. They waited for 2 hours and the girls

We got Team Meatball out of there.

They took her license and she can no longer drive anymore. She also has to pay some fines. They come back to their place. Snooki immediately phones Jionni. Jionni tells Snooki that Roger isn’t coming. He’s got a work problem. Jenni calls Roger. Roger says that his vacation time got denied because he didn’t give enough time for his notice. It’s out of this hands. Jenni starts to cry. Deanna says that it’s time to go out. Snooki is staying home.

The boys also go out.

I have seen that Club Space had such a better ratio between hot dog buns and hot dogs, that I am determined to get it in tonight.

Snooki is talking to Jionni. The doorbell rings. It’s Brittany. Snooki lets her in so that she can chill in Mike’s bed until he comes home with another girl.

Dude I thought I was psycho and crazy, this bitch is fucking beyond psycho and crazy. I don’t even know what to call it. You’re a wildebeest.

The girls come back and find the situation pretty funny.

Oh God, I’m going to poop my pants, I’m so excited.

Mike, Pauly and Vinny come back with girls. Mike gets a little surprise.

This is going to be tough to get out of.

I already got a bun in the oven. No need to warm up another one.

Mike shows the Aussie chick to the door because Brittany was getting naked.

The next morning or afternoon because Jionni is flying in. She doesn’t know what to wear. Jenni is talking to Roger.

Jionni finally arrives. Nicole is cute with him. She starts to cry.

Let’s go to the smush room.
Snooki, as soon as Jionni walks in

Jionni say stat he needs to take a shower. Mike is freaking out. He says that Jionni knows about Mike and Snooki.

His wiener is tanned and I love it.

Do your thing, Kung Fu Panda.
Deanna about Mike

Mike says that if they come close to him, he’ll start kicking. At the club, Mike says the the floor is nice and grippy. Mike is starting shit about Jionni to anyone who will listen.

Me and Jionni, we’re going to have Guido babies. I can’t wait to pop those suckers out. They’re going to be so fucking cute and tan. I’m so excited. I’m going to have a C-section coz I don’t want it fuck up my vagina.

Snooki and Jionni notice something odd about Mike. They leave for another club.

Mike is having an imaginary confrontation in his head.

If Mike says anything to Jionni, I’m legit gonna punch Mike in the face.

Snooki’s shows off her ass and underwear to Jionni. He tells her that she is dancing like a whore. She basically yanked her swanky dress up and showed off her privates. Ronnie mouths WTF. He throws her jacket at her and leaves. He tells Jenni that she embarrassed him. He leaves the club. Nicole comes running. She falls down a couple of times. She runs after him. None of the HM get involved. Ronnie gets involved. He tells Snooki to go to Jenni. Snooki freaks out. Ronnie goes after Jionni.

Snooki is acting like she’s nutters. After getting bitched out by Snooki, Jenni goes looking for Jionni. Ronnie finally finds Jionni. He ran off for a few blocks. They hear Snooki screaming in the background. Jionni says that she is embarrassing him and being trashy. He says that he needs to leave her and does.

Snooki is crying on some corner. Jenni is still chasing her. Snooki continues to freak out in the cab ride home. Deanna, Sam, and Snooki take her home. The boys come home as well. Pauly doesn’t care. Vinny is being nice.

After being chased for blocks by Jenni, Jionni sits down on a bench.

Hmm, Flash keeps crashing and it’s getting annoying. WTF Adobe. That’s 2 times within a 41 min episode. Jenni finally comes home.

She showed her vagina and boobs on the dance floor.

The boys grill some burgers and hot dogs.

We’re going to cook some food and wait for it to kick off.

Jionni finally comes home and Snooki comes running. Jionni ignores her. He tells Snooki to get away from him. Snooki pushes herself into the bathroom. Snooki denies that she pulled up her skirt.

Watching Nicole and Jionni is like a movie of me and Ron. I go through this all the time. And now, I’m on the other side and I don’t like it.

Snooki ends up crying in her bed. Jionni takes his stuff and leaves. He gets into a taxi and drives off. Nicole comes running again.

I go a little crazy when I drink.

* * * * *

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Author: range

I'm mathematician/IT strategist/blogger from Canada living in Taipei.

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