Big Brother UK S12E28 (Channel 5)

Anton, have you got a semi?
Faye

Last night, Anton had a party. The HM are rudely woken up and have to clean up the backyard. Harry is the first one outside to clean. The others follow. Alex and Tom are dodging the cleaning up, as is Aden.

Lou tells Jay that no one ever has ever done that for her before. That’s why she was shocked.

Faye tells Aaron that he looks quite normal, but when he opens his mouth he’s quite odd. Aaron hasn’t had sex in 7 years, he hasn’t wanted off in 2 years. Jeez, his balls must be bursting. The last time he had sex was with his ex-wife. He talks about being divorced and then needs some time alone.

For today’s task, HM have paired up and are fat hungry truckers. They get 3 min to tear around the track and eat as many mini-burgers as possible. Team Faisy start out. Aden is the burger attendant. Faisy get 7. Team Talex gets 4. Team Larry get 7. Team Marron get 11. Team Janton gets 12. Anton spits some burgers out. They win, but their reward isn’t going to be happy.

Tom, I’ve seen more meat on a butcher’s pencil.
Lou

Janton have become fast food until further notice. Jay is a hot dog and Anton is a burger. They get a burger meal each.

That is the shittest prize ever.
Harry

Lou decides to tackle Anton to the ground. She keeps him down. It’s funny.

Maisy is exercising Tom and Alex in the pool. Her hair looks really ugly.

Jay says that this reward is terrible. Faye and Aaron play I Spy. Then they play 20 questions.

Jay comes to the diary room. He says that they’ve cracked him. He’s done. It’s one of the hottest days in the year.

Lou tells Alex that she doesn’t fancy Jay anymore. It’s the hot dog suit.

BB makes the hot dog and burger an offer. They have to stay in their suits in order to provide alcohol for the HM. They won’t get any. They tell the HM.

Janton is called back to the diary room. They get to end the task and get a beer and ice cream. Or if they remain in their costumes, the HM will get more drinks and ice cream.

You’ve broke us.
Jay

They choose to give the HM the booze and ice cream. That was nice. Jay is getting angry. It’s Haagen Dasz ice cream. The girls have to lay back to eat it. Chocolate overload.

After 6 hours of wearing the hot dog suit, Jay installs a personal cooling system. Janton is called back to the diary room.

I’m trying to make funnel to breathe out of me armpits.
Jay

Janton get to take off their costumes. They get a lot of lager and two bottles of wine.

Aaron and Harry are thinking of nominations. Aaron says that Tom, Anton, and Jay don’t like him.

Maisy says that Aaron is weird. He would have had sex with Maisy in the bed. Maisy says that she was so horny. Lou says that Aaron likes Faye a lot. Maisy agrees. Jay says that Aaron said that he likes the fact that Faye is dominating.

I like to be dominated in the bedroom.
Faye

My ex is 40 and had a child.
Faye

Faye is on top of Anton for some reason. Anton says that he needs to get clothes on. Faye touches his wiener. Anton says that he doesn’t have a semi. Anton says that he saw Aaron in the window and he implied that Anton should get his paws off his girlfriend. Faye says that Maisy should kiss Anton and then goes away.

Once you’ve had black, it’s a wheel chair and that’s that.
Jay

BB calls Jay to the diary room. He is told that he shouldn’t make racist jokes. He asks Aaron if the joke is racist. Aaron is appalled. It’s apparently a line from White Chicks.

Faye is all alone waiting for Aaron, who’s in the diary room. She falls asleep and then leaves for the bedroom.

Aaron is crying in the diary room. He’s angry. People have been making racist jokes. He’s so upset! Holy crap, what a wanker.

* * * * *

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