Jersey Shore Living Without Jionni S05E11 (MTV)

The cast reunited, via Vulture

I’ve mentioned to someone that watching the Jersey Shore is like watching Animal Planet. It’s like watching the mating habits of a cheetah, or something like that. There’s no doubt in my mind that this is true. I’ve also noticed that the vocabulary that the cast uses is quite insidious and sometimes appropriate, especially if you go out a lot and date. The words DTF, creeping, and other terms are a common occurrence when you open your eyes. The vocabulary is also very easy to use.

The prank was pretty good, but Mike is all pissy about people touching his stuff. He almost cries, the boys are at a loss. It’s the last episode of this series and everyone goes home. Except for Vinny hooking up with a pair of lesbians, nothing much happens.

Warning: This post might offend you.

[Ed. note: I had to put some warning here, and I thought that this was kind of funny, but you have been warned!]

Mike looks even dumber than he usually looks.

The HM come back and start freaking out.

This prank ends prank wars.

Mike is pissed. It’s about to rain. Ronnie brings in his stuff. Mike cries and leaves his stuff out.

Mike is being such a little bitch right now, that his name should be changed from the Situation to the Bitchuation.

Pauly and Vinny help him bring his stuff back in.

Deena’s sister is dating Mike’s brother. Mike found out that Deena’s sister squirts or something like that. He tells Snooki about it and doesn’t know if he’ll use it for good or evil. He’s an asshat.

The HM go out to Jenks. Vinny talks with some lesbians. He’s intrigued by them.

Deena’s sister is at Jenks. It gets awkward quickly. Deena finds out about the squirting and she’s not happy.

Basically, you want what you can’t have. I want lesbians. What better challenge than a girl who doesn’t like penis.

Vinny brings the two lesbians bak home. Ronnie doesn’t let him have it. Ronnie finally relents. Pauly is impressed.

He’s going to try to turn two lesbians straight.

Vinny takes his lesbos to bed. Deena wants to have a talk with Mike about the shit he’s talking about his sister. Mike tries to talk himself out of the hole he dug for himself.

The next day, Vinny says goodbye to his lesbians. There is a big storm coming. Deena is freaking out. It’s a tornado. The sirens start sounding.

I saw the Wizard of Oz. I don’t want to be like Dorothy freaking flying all over the place.

The HM convince her not to drive anywhere. The HM are going to Karma. Mike sees his brother with Joanie. Deena sees them and she’s pissed.

Mike manages to convince her to let it go.

The next day, Sammi is trying to get the boys back. She plans on using a slingshot with some water balloons.

The HM are cooking Sunday dinner and the fire alarm keeps going off.

That must be jelly because jam don’t shake like that.

Deena and Jenni put on som feat suits. Then the boys go fly some kites. The girls try to prank them. Ronnie sneaks back in and locks the door to the deck. The boys get them back. Deena screams for a truce. Then she tries to get the boys. The four boys end up squirting her. She ends up in the Jacuzzi.

One thing I will not miss about this house is Pauly’s Oh Yeah, Wake Up Yeah shit.

The HM are woken up by Pauly and some smoke detectors. Then they start packing. Then they leave.

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Author: range

I'm mathematician/IT strategist/blogger from Canada living in Taipei.

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